How much do older women want sex?

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Topics: Sex, Variety

How much do older women want sex? From The Chicago Sun-Times:

Women over 50 want sex. Lots of sex. Hot sex. And when they get it, they write about it so others, too, can learn how to get lots of hot sex.

So the answer to “how much do older women want sex” is: a lot. They want sex just as much as younger women — they just need a man who knows how to give it to them.

The great myth of our society is that when we hit 30, our sex drives just evaporate. It is true that many people experiences big drops in their sex lives at later ages, but the reason isn’t BIOLOGICAL. It’s PSYCHOLOGICAL.

The main reason why people report declining sex drives as they get older is because they are not having as much great sex. This is due to many factors: kids, societal expectations, relationship problems, becoming jaded, etc. This, naturally leads to a lower sex drive. But there’s nothing “genetic” about this — women and men both naturally desire sex into their sixties, seventies, and beyond. All of these factors, while they are challenges, can be OVERCOME. You don’t have to settle for a mediocre sex life once you hit 40, or 50, or 60.

I’m posting this because a significant amount of guys who attend my bootcamps and who read my book are over 50. And society pounds these men with the limiting belief that because they’re not 19 anymore, they can’t be having great sex. That’s simply not true.

I know a good amount of men who are over 50 and married for 20 or 30 years…and are still having hot, passionate sex with their wives on a regular basis. And I know women over 50 who are constantly telling me about their sexual escapades with their boyfriends or husbands.

Occasionally, men will tell me “your stuff is great, but it doesn’t apply to men my age.” Guess what — it DOES apply to men your age, because men your age are APPLYING it in the EXACT SAME SITUATION. The principles of sexual desire are universal. They apply to everyone, in every situation, of every age.

You can read the full article about how much older women want sex below:

Women over 50 want sex. Lots of sex. Hot sex. And when they get it, they write about it so others, too, can learn how to get lots of hot sex.

What else to conclude from the new niche of sex-and-older-women books? Here are a few that have come out recently:

Sex & the 60s: How to Survive as a Senior Woman in Today’s Dating World, whose 70-year-old author, Cissy Wechter, lives with a man half her age (Authorhouse, $14.95).

(Scott Stewart/Sun-Times)

A selection of recent sex-and-older-women books.

Prime: Adventures and Advice on Sex, Love and the Sensual Years, a memoir by sexologist Pepper Schwartz (Collins, $24.95).Over the Hill and Between the Sheets: Sex, Love and Lust in Middle Age, an anthology of essays edited by Gail Belsky (Springboard, $23.99).

Sex Lives of Wives: Reigniting the Passion by Holly H. Hollenbeck, founder of, a how-to based on “true confessions and provocative advice from real women” (Springboard, $23.99).

Mating in Captivity: Reconciling the Erotic and the Domestic by Esther Perel seeks to remedy “the inescapable death of eros” (HarperCollins, $24.95).

It’s not fair to lump Chicagoan Francine Pappadis Friedman’s MatchDotBomb: A Midlife Journey Through Internet Dating (Wheatmark, $15.95) into the “search for sex” genre. Her well-told saga about Internet dating deserves mention, however, for its insights into how middle age is like a second adolescence: physical changes and body image issues, hormone surges and mood swings, the general angst of a changing identity, entering a profound new phase of life and not knowing how to act.

Here are a few details on the rest of the pack:

Over the Hill and Between the Sheets is a standout that approaches the topic from myriad perspectives. There are sexy confessionals from Joyce Maynard, Caroline Leavitt, Jacqueline Mitchard and other stellar contributors.

Self-help meets soft porn in Prime. Schwartz, a University of Washington sociology professor whose name you might recognize from The Great Sex Weekend and Everything You Know About Love and Sex Is Wrong, talks about her own adventures in a straightforward, clinical manner that allows for examination and analysis. There are many messages in her “reevaluation of what is possible in the second half of women’s lives.”

In Mating in Captivity, Perel, a couples and family therapist in New York, draws anecdotes from her practice to fit any sexual scenario. A sample: “You know, a lot of couples play with objectivication as a way to superimpose otherness on a partner who’s become too familiar.”

The short version of Sex Lives of Wives: There are many creative ways to keep the flame of passion lit, but the underpinnings are “Attitude! Attitude! Attitude!” It’s Total Woman of the new millennium.

Wechter is the unabashed “honey, let me tell you” spokeswoman for a generation of women brought up to be coy about sex. Widowed at 62, after 44 years of marriage, she grieved for three years before jumping back into the dating pool. “It was sex,” she said. “I realized I was too young to let that go.”

She now is three years into a relationship with a 34-year-old. “Older women can please men in ways our daughters will never know,” she says.

Original article from The Chicago Sun-Times

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